The Studowyke

What is the Studowyke you ask? Well many high bribed scholars have described it as a modern day wonderland. It's a place that is always open for business. Business being pleasure. Pleasure being fun. Fun being whatever the fuck you want it to be. Pardon the colloquialism.

Originally founded in the year 2011 AD, its founder Cameron Ludowyke (who will hence forth be known as Cameron the Magnificent), wanted to create a haven for those similar to him in wealth. During the day, the Studowyke takes the form of an everyday suburban household. It is fitted out with cable television, video game console systems and heated water. Guests can often be found lounging among its many sofas, eating snacks prepared by the house chambermaid, (DJ be her name). Three refrigerators are located throughout the venue, primarily to keep items cold. Alcoholic beverages are among the many items.

Alcohol is seen in a very 'Take a penny, leave a penny' light. Sure you can come over and indulge yourself in the various cognacs on display, but every so often feel free to share or donate some of your own for the good of the cause. The Studowyke would be nothing without its guests.

At night the Studowyke takes many forms. Modestly being named Greatest Night Club in the Universe for 6 consecutive minutes, it is also a spot for friendly, and good looking guests to, pardon my jargon, "Crash the Night". Just make sure you warn Cameron the Magnificent first. He doesn't like being shaken awake at 5AM. No matter how hilarious it might be. At least give him a two minute head start to put clothes on.

Enjoy all your future experiences at The Studowyke, and please refrain from emptying yourself in the water feature.

As Cameron the Magnificent once said; "Ahhhh, let me check with my mum first".
Couldn't have put it better myself...